Loosen up Sasuke!
by Annesi
Summary: Sasuke is such a stiff. Someone needs to teach him how to live life... just a little bit. Naruto decides to take that task. They had no Idea what kind of person he could be once he loosened up!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: OK, I got a Naruto Fic out there for all you Naruto lovers( you know I couldn't forget about y'all!!)**

**I'm not sure how the updates will come in though because I'm working on two fics at the same time.**

**OK, ahead of time warnings:**

**Loads of cussing: And I mean loads of it.**

**Naruto and Sasuke are not gay: It might seem like it, but there not.**

**I do not own Naruto... So there I said it, creators of Naruto, don't sue me. You'd probably get more money looking through your trash than taking from my bank account.**

**Sasuke is a smart mouth: Hey, sasuke is not very nice. Very short and sweet to the point.**

**Don't worry, whether you're a Naruto fan or a Sasuke fan, you're gonna love it. Just pick who you wanna feel for. But um, no one cares about sakura so, don't expect to see her too much. More characters are going to show their face, ya just gotta wait.**

**If you feel offended by anything you read, for instance... If I call Naruto a dumb ass, then just stop reading the Fic!**

**Loosen up sasuke!**

It was the second semester at Konoha University. Sasuke, Naruto, and Sakura were studying up because test were next week. Sasuke however, was the type of student that took studying to a whole new level- A whole new level like taking his text books with him everywhere!

Sasuke was always ruining Naruto and Sakura's fun. It was either because Sasuke wanted to stay in his dorm and study, or he wanted to stay in the library and study. Either way, The guy was just studying way to hard.

They never met a person with straight A's down the list, perfect attendance, and spent every waking moment in his text books. He barely talked to anyone besides Naruto, and Sakura, and the only reason he talked to them, was because he didn't have a choice. They were SO damn annoying, always bothering him every time he was trying to work.

It was either, Sasuke let's go eat pizza, or Sasuke let's go to the game. ' Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke, god damn stop calling my name you morons!' He almost constantly thought.

Sasuke just wanted to keep his head inside of his books and never return to the real world, unless it was to get a new book, or take the exams. He had already laid out his life plans. To graduate, become the smartest person in the world, dominate the world, and, and...well, that was pretty much about it.

" Sasuke, I know you don't like going out but-" Naruto started in an unsure voice.

" No, no, no and no." Sasuke answered quickly, prepared for any stupid questions Naruto might ask.

" Oh Sasuke, we're just going to the carnival, I know you want to go." Naruto tried to convince him.

Sasuke quivered. " How can you live with yourself knowing that you are failing."

" Huh?" Naruto asked stupidly, " What, you mean my grades?."

" Yes, your horrible, unworthy grades. It makes my eyes burn when I see your F's." Sasuke cringed.

" Wow Sasuke," Naruto started in an uninterested voice," My grades aren't that bad."

" They are!" Sasuke nodded. " You need to put your head in some books."

Naruto rolled his eyes. " Why so I can be like you?... No thanks..."

" You'll get much power... maybe even rule the world." Sasuke said sheepishly.

" How do you get power from books?" Naruto laughed.

" You never heard? he who holds the books, holds the power. I have books, I have power, So I make good grades."

" Um, no I never heard of that... I might remember it one day... maybe even use it...ha ha..me with books!" Naruto laughed.

Sasuke sighed. " Some fools never learn." He said while walking away.

" Hey Sasuke where you going?!" Naruto said trying to catch up with him.

" To study," He replied. " Don't bother coming, cause I know all you'll do is make paper airplanes and eat Twinkies the whole time."

Sasuke paused and thought to himself. " Oh yea, and ask me really stupid questions."

Naruto lowered his head. " Gee, that's harsh Sasuke."

" Yea well, life is harsh... That's why you need your books and graduation." Sasuke said while entering the library door. " I'll call you at five."

That was all Naruto heard before the library door slammed in his face. He would have went inside, but he was so afraid of to many books at once. He might actually...you know, learn something if he went in.

Later on, Naruto ended up back at the dorm waiting on Sasuke. It's was 4:59 pm. Sasuke was a very timely person, so if he said he'd call at five, he was going to call exactly at five.

Naruto's big blue eyes closely watched the second hand as it jerked itself to 5:00.

His pants began to buzz. He knew it was Sasuke.

" Hey Sasuke what's up."

" Hi Naruto. Listen, I have to stay at the library late today.

" Huh, aw Sasuke, you promised you'd come spend time with me!!" Naruto whined.

" What, I never promised you anything, I just said I would call you at five... that was it."

Naruto sat silently on the phone. " Well fine Sasuke... I could see if you were out chasing honeys, but books?"

Naruto heard the sharp click of Sasuke hanging up on the other end.

" Damn it Sasuke... you bookworm.

Naruto had got an idea he was sure to work. He called Sasuke back.

" Hello, Naruto you know I can't use my cellphone in the library."

" Sasuke! They're having an all out Text book sale at the library, Their closing in like an hour!!"

" Huh, where did you hear that?"

" I didn't even know it was around. I just went to the library and they were selling."

" You went to the library?" Sasuke said with disbelief.

" Yes, and at the school library they were having the biggest sale of them all!"

" OK, I'll be there in like 10 minutes."

Then Sasuke hung up the phone. Naruto was practically jumping with joy. Sasuke was coming back to the school...Yes!

Sasuke left the library and went back to the school. He quickly rushed through the door and up the stairs heading to the school library. As he passed the hallway the led to the Cafe, he saw Naruto, Sakura, and..a creepy looking freak..

"Sasuke!" Naruto shouted. " Over here!"

As Sasuke got closer and closer to Naruto, his feelings of glee faded sharply. As it always did.

" Name is ukiachi, but you can call me ukiachi." Ukiachi smiled.

Sasuke's jaw almost dropped. " ...um..OK...Where are the books?"

Naruto scratched the back of his head. " Oh, well, about those books... I was lying. I just wanted you to stop jam packing your face in those books every single day, 12 hours a day."

Sasuke looked at Naruto, then lowered his eyebrows. " I'm going back to my dorm," He said in a why did I even waste my time voice.

" Sasuke!" Naruto shouted playfully, " Don't be such a jerk, just this once please, she's a new student!" He said with a huge grin.

Sasuke just looked at him. ' He brought me all the way down here to meet a feather brained girl.' He thought.

Then he sighed. "... I guess I should give in to your smile..." He said pitting Naruto. " But I'm not... So I'm going to say no, and refrain from beating you with a 10 pound dictionary."

" C'mon Sasuke." Naruto Whined.

" Where do you expect to get with your excessive whining?" Sasuke questioned. " Certainly you didn't think I would care, now did you? C'mon Naruto."

Naruto's face frowned. He had had it with Sasuke always being a stiff ass. He was pretty sure Sasuke just thought he was the shit, and everyone else was just... well, pretty much, shit!

" You know what, fine then, go to your dorm and go be a stiff ass." Naruto yelled, putting emphasis on stiff ass.

Sasuke's eyes widened from the remark. " I don't have time for this. Naruto, you are dumb and immature."

Naruto fanned outwards with his hands, summoning Sasuke to go. " Whatever, Sauske. Go to your dorm and read your textbooks," He said in a bored tone, " And I hope that while you're studying for hours it will start hurting. That might encourage you to stop sitting on it all the time."

Sasuke lifted an eyebrow. " Sitting on what?"

" Your stiff ass!" Naruto yelled. " Jeez, how many times do I have to say it?!"

Sukara and Ukiachi tried to hold back their laughing. Well, maybe Ukiachi didn't try, but Sukara did.

" I don't know," Sasuke said very annoyed." But I'd wish you stop saying that shit!"

" Why get mad at what you are, you're stiff, you're lifeless." Naruto paused to see Sasuke's reaction. Clearly not good, but Naruto still continued rambling. " Basically you getting mad at me calling you a stiff ass, is like getting mad at me for calling you Sasuke!"

Sasuke walked away to his dorm without shooting a reply back to Naruto.

" You can't be mad at what you are..you stiff ass!" Naruto shouted as Sasuke started to disappear.

In the dorm..

Sasuke plopped himself down on his bed and sighed. He couldn't believe Naruto was trying to change on him. " That idiot, that dumb ass, that retard, that stupid, stupid... ugh!!" Sasuke yelled, trying to find the word to describe Naruto.

He couldn't. He was too mad, and too busy thinking about all of the name calling. How dare Naruto go so far as to call him a 'stiff ass'. He couldn't be to mad at Naruto though, because at least a stiff ass was all Naruto called him. If Naruto had said you're a stiff ass bitch, or, you're a stiff ass retard, then he would have easily punched him in the face.

He didn't know what Naruto did, but for some reason he didn't study at all when he got back to the dorm. He just slept.

" Get up Sasuke." A very annoying voice snapped at him.

Sasuke put his hand over his head. " Don't tell me you're still mad about yesterday."

" Nope," Naruto said loudly, " That's why I'm taking you out, and you're not refusing."

" Nope," Sasuke said. He went to his closet and opened it. What he didn't see, made his jaw fall off( A/N: Practically anyway.).

" Yep." Naruto said, looking in the closet with him. " No studying until you going out for breakfast with me... deal?"

" Where the hell are my books Naruto?!" Sasuke said with extreme anger.

" Ah, aha.. He who holds the books, holds the power. And that would be me this time." Naruto smiled devilishly.

Sasuke frowned. " Fine then. 1 stupid meal. But if you don't give my books back afterwards, I will slit your throat."

Naruto tried to ignore the very scary threat Sasuke threw at him, while trying to keep his smile.

" McDonald's...McDonald's... That's where you were going to take me?" Sasuke said smartly.

" Yea, what's wrong with McDonald's?" Naruto asked, while parking the car in the parking lot.

" People who don't graduate work here. This is the only money they can make. You will be working here soon too."

Naruto glanced at him and smirked. " Wow Sasuke, to be such a smart person, you some ignorant things."

Sasuke looked away. He didn't know whether to get mad, or agree. " I'm simply stating fact." Damn he had did it again.

Naruto just got out of the car and ignored him.

They walked inside, to the counter, and ordered.

" I'll have 7 double cheese burgers and 3 small fries please!" Naruto said with a huge grin. " Oh yea, and a coke

The clerk just stared at him stupidly. Then the clerk looked at Sasuke. " And you?"

" Hey!" Naruto yelled. " You didn't put my order in."

" Don't worry," The cashier said, " I have a good memory."

Sasuke shook his head. Sometime he wasn't being ignorant, he really was telling the truth.

" Hey Hun!" the cashier called Sasuke. " What you ordering."

" Oh, um..." Sasuke started. " I'll have a... Dropped out of high school made meal..um.."

Naruto elbowed him. " Sasuke."

" Oh I'm sorry, I'll have a didn't attempt to think about my future..." Sasuke continued. " You know, people like you are a constant reminder of how much I need to graduate."

The cashier stared stupidly once more.

Naruto jumped. " Um, that was short for a bacon double cheese burger!"

Naruto reached in his pocket and pulled out a 20. " We'll be right back, tell us when our food is done, keep the change!" He said grabbing Sasuke so they could sit outside.

" Sasuke, you've gotta stop being so rude to people without educations. If they didn't try, they wouldn't have a job."

" Hmp, it's all about how hard you try. If you don't try hard, you get a crappy job."

" People need to have time to live out their lives too. Not everyone can make perfect grades."

" Well, I can, because I work hard, and I know what I want in life."

Naruto looked at him more seriously. " Sasuke. It's great that you make excellent grades, but you need to live."

" I do."

" No, you don't. you're practically dead. A smart dead man. No one knows you're alive.

" They do too. I make the best grades in Konoha, who doesn't know that.

Naruto touched Sasuke's shoulder. " Yes they know that, but they don't know you.."

Sasuke thought for a moment. Maybe the stupid blond was right. Maybe he didn't have a life. Maybe he was really boring. Maybe he truly was a stiff ass.

Naruto pulled out a juice box and opened it. He inserted the straw and gulped the juice down in less than 5 seconds.

." OK... maybe I am a stiff.", Sasuke mumbled, almost inaudible.

" Huh?" Naruto said squeezing the life out of his juice box, trying to get the last few drops. " I didn't hear that Stick Sasuke."

" I said, maybe I am being a bit of a stiff..." Sasuke said a bit louder, but still in a tone to low to hear. If you weren't paying attention- like Naruto and his juice box- Then you really couldn't hear what he was saying.

" Speak up Stick Sasuke, before I make up a new nickname for your non working voice." Naruto said, finally getting his last few drips. " Ah... Nothing like apple juice."

" I said I'm a stiff!" Sasuke yelled, his out burst causing people walking by to stare at him like some kind of retard.

" Whatever you do, don't point," A lady said to her three children.

Sasuke looked at the lady then back at Naruto, waiting for his reply. He knew there was gonna be one, a smart one too. It was going to be a Naruto reply.

" It's good you said that Sasuke," Naruto said, standing up reaching in his pocket for his keys." The best way to recover from a problem, is by admitting that you have one."

Sasuke placed his hands on his temples. He could not believe he was listening to Naruto, of all people. Naruto was a energy packed fool... Oh yea, that's why he was listening to Naruto.

" Well it is very obvious you know something I don't... So spill it," Sasuke threatened.

" OK, OK. Damn Sasuke." Naruto said with a sweat drop. " Well, first things first, Stop threatening people all the time. It makes you seem so scary. Scary people don't have friends because they're so damn...well, scary!"

Sasuke slammed his hand down on the table. " Tell me something I don't know you pompous!" Sasuke yelled. Once again, attracting more attention to himself.

Naruto waved his hands in defense. "See, right there. You're yelling scary stuff causing people to look at you, people don't like scary people."

" I'm just trying to say, I already know this Naruto." Sasuke managed to say, in a more calm tone.

" Very good Sasuke." Naruto clapped. " I thought I was going to have to change your name to Shouting, Screaming, Scary Sasuke."

Sasuke blinked at Naruto, as if he were a complete moron. " Were you really serious about that?"

" Yea!" Naruto said loudly, with that retarded huge grin again.

" Oh," Sasuke said. " You are a complete moron, sometimes its really sad..."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N : OK, about the last chapter, there were a few typo's. Not that I didn't Spell check, proof read, and have someone else proof read. What happened was while she was reading it, she was slowing changing it too... slowly messing up my story.**

**Um, also, I'm a bit confused, but I believe a lot of people like my story because of the high rate of hits and alerts I've been getting, And I mean High! But why no reviews? Oh well, as long as you like it. Reviews make me update quicker, because I'm a people pleaser, I feel pressured to do so. If I get no reviews, I figure people like it, but at the same time I can take my time with it. If you want me to update quicker, Letting me know is key ( Yes I said is Key. That's not a typo). I could care less of Reviews, your hits just flatter me so!**

**Any who, my proof reader has to be perfectly watched before I submit this time. Let's get on with the Warnings:**

**Loads of Cussing: If you don't like cussing, please turn around.**

**Naruto and Sasuke are not gay: Don't be tricked into clapping your hands thinking it's a Yaoi.**

**Kakashi is EXTREMELY suicidal!: Please keep all sharp items away from him.**

**Note: Loosen up Sasuke is not something that's thought of as nasty. Keep your mind out the gutter!!**

**Very short chapter. I've been working on this chapter and chapter 3. So while chapter 2 is short and lacking, chapter 3 is way longer and I can update by tomorrow. When I update, it's always at the same time. Around 5:00pm. So keep that in mind, next chapter is November 17th at 5:00. Be there are be super square.**

**I don't own Naruto, nor do I plan on selling it. I'm so poor, I'm waiting to jump in the middle of the street so I can sue and get some money... Something I wish I had a lot more of.**

**OK, on with the story.**

**Loosen up Sasuke**

**Chapter 2**

**Naruto toppled paper swans on his desk and moved them like they were on a lake. " Ha ha, Look at the swans go." He laughed to himself. He put the paper swans up to each other as if they were kissing, then laughed to himself again.**

**" A-hem," Kakashi struggled through his neck.**

**Naruto turned to him with a eyebrow lifted. " Is something wrong with your neck Kakashi sensei?"**

**" Yes, I had something in my neck." He started." Naruto, why are you playing with paper swans?..."**

**" Cause I made them, so I'm enjoying them, duh!" Naruto said putting the swans behind his back.**

**" Well how about paying attention. I don't want to be here just as much as you don't." Kakashi said, turning to walk away.**

**" Kakashi sensei!" Naruto yelled to him.**

**Kakashi rolled his eyes and sighed. " Yes Uzumaki."**

**" I don't get it... What's the big deal about getting an education anyways?"**

**Kakashi froze in the spot he was in to think about the question. ' It's always gotta be Naruto.' He thought.**

**" You need your education," Kakashi said bored. " With out it you'd be stupid."**

**Sasuke smirked. ' Naruto is already stupid, empty minded, and Null.' he thought.**

**" Um, Kakashi sensei?" Naruto asked, a bit more seriously.**

**" What Naruto..." Kakashi answered, super annoyed.**

**" Do you think I'm stupid?" Naruto said, a bit emotional.**

**Kakashi's eyes widened, then resumed back to his bored sleepy eyed look. " Naruto, The answer to that question, is the same as to this question. Do I want to shoot myself right now with an AK47?"**

**Naruto squinted out of confusion. " Well...Do you want to shoot yourself?"**

**Kakashi cracked his neck then massaged it. " Yes, yes I do."**

**Naruto smirked. " I think I need to get my class changed, since I have a suicidal teacher."**

**" Hm hm, Naruto, you wouldn't be the only one happy if it happened." Kakashi said, tired of life.**

**" So what are we gonna talk about today Kakashi sensei?" Naruto said, trying to be interested in class.**

**" I'm glad you asked," He said cracking his neck. " Today were going to talk about nooses."**

**Naruto looked uncomfortable. Not only ways he tired of Sasuke's ' OMG I gotta read all freaking day!' mess. He was tired of Kakashi's ' OMG will you please kill me NOW, here I'll BUY you the gun!', attitude.**

Naruto raised his hand. " I'd rather not talk about noose's today Kakashi sensei."

Kakashi stared him straight in his eyes. " Well, I'd rather not be living, but I am."

Kakashi put two fingers up to his neck. He felt for a pulse, which unfortunately was there.

" Hmp," Kakashi said angrily. " and they said praying works!"

" I'm just saying. No one wants to hear you talk about nooses!" Naruto said bored.

" Well, we're not talking about nooses today then." Kakashi said smiling- But no one could see that!-." We're doing a hands on experiment with them!"

" No we're not Kakashi!" Sasuke yelled. " Try it with the next class."

" The first person who makes a perfect noose and wraps it around my neck gets an A+." Kakashi said happily, ignoring Sasuke.

Sasuke sighed. He wished Kakashi would cut it out. That crap was so annoying.

" If you can actually hang me, I'll give you 100$" Kakashi continued.

The class smacked their teeth. Naruto crammed his hand into his face. Everyone was tired of Kakashi.

" I Even hold my breath before I go to bed, hoping I'll fall asleep holding my breath," Kakashi sighed. " But in the morning I'm always still alive."

Sasuke sighed. " Get over yourself if you wanna die, just quit your job and eat a lot of McDonald's. Sell your house, and live on the streets. When people offer you change don't take it, and you'll die from starvation." Sasuke said wrapping it all up. " Can I get my A now, or do I have to slit your throat first?"

Kakashi's eyes widened. " You'd do that for me?" He said, sounding like he had life for the first time ever.

" Hell no Kakashi!" Sasuke yelled. " Stop asking us to kill you!!!"

'Aw...' Kakashi thought. ' So much for your students caring about you.'

It looked like he would have to give up this time on the suicidal attempts again. Oh well, there's always next time for self mutilation.

He walked to his desk And pulled out the teacher hand book. " Alright class." He said disappointedly." Turn to Chapter 23, today we're going to talk about Genocide's that went down in history...seriously.."

When class let out Naruto ran happily to Sasuke. " Hey Sasuke!"

" Huh?" Sasuke said annoyed. " Stop acting gay. We just had a class together!"

" I know, but I'm still excited." Naruto said jolted. " Hey look, there's Kiba!"

" Oh great." Sasuke said unenthused.

Kiba came out of the classroom looking a bit disturbed.

" Oh, what's up Kiba!" Naruto greeted him.

" Hey Naruto, sup Sasuke." Kiba said in a sad tone. " You want to go hang out at the park?"

" Do we!" Naruto said with excitement.

" I don't..." Sasuke said walking away.

" It's Important Sasuke, it'll only be 20 minutes or less, that's if you count the 10 minutes it takes to walk there." Kiba said. Something was bothering him for real. He had a look on his face as if he couldn't forgive himself. Sasuke couldn't just leave like that. Well he could, but he decided not to.

" What's wrong with you?" Sasuke pointed out, as they began to start walking.

" Oh nothing... Except I wanna kill Kakashi." Kiba said, Like it was alright to kill your teacher.

" HM?" Sasuke said not looking at Kiba, " I'm sorry what did you say?"

" I said I want to kill Kakashi." Kiba repeated slower.

" Kakashi sensei?" Naruto questioned.

" That's the only Kakashi I know." Kiba said smartly.

Sasuke gave him a dumb look, then looked away. " Whatever, kill Kakashi, or whatever you're gonna do..." he said trying to end the conversation.

" you wanna kill Kakashi?" Naruto smirked. " Don't give him what he asks for. Make his life miserable. Anyways, I'm failing his class!"

" Well, I do want to kill him!" Kiba said excitingly. " I want that 100$."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. " You know Kakashi is just talking!!"

" I really want that money." Kiba said trembling a bit.

Sasuke and Naruto glanced at each other.

" Kiba!" Sasuke turned to him seriously. " You're re really going to murder Kakashi?"

Kiba looked at the table.

" For 100$?" Naruto added.

" It's just that he keeps asking for it. It's starting to sound good to me.!" Kiba said uncomfortably.

" C'mon Kiba, If I asked you to have sex with me, you wouldn't do it, now would you?" Naruto asked.

Kiba and Sasuke just stared at him. Sasuke gave Naruto a look of disgust.

Sasuke pulled out his ' How to ignore people' book, and started reading and walking.

Naruto lowered his eyebrows.' He always picks a great time to start reading, right when Kiba wants to Kill Sensei."

" I know what we can do!" Naruto smiled happily. " Lets go spend a day with Kakashi to find out why he wants us to-"

" No Naruto!" Sasuke interrupted him. " Hell no. You're always saying something stupid."

" Hey, that might be a good Idea" Kiba added," Then I might not want to kill him anymore if he's happy."

Sasuke sighed. " Well then you two dumb asses can go together. Leave me out of it."

" It'll be great Sasuke, and you to can warm up to Kakashi sensei!" Naruto said happily.

Sasuke crammed his face closer into the book.

" Sasuke!" Naruto said annoyingly.

" Why me!" Sasuke growled. " Why did I have to be Sasuke Uchiha?!"

" Chill out man, he's only asking." Kiba defended Naruto.

" He's only asking, and whining, and being very annoying." Sasuke groaned.

Kiba didn't have anything to say. Naruto _was_ being kind of annoying.

" It's OK Kiba, Sasuke's like that all the time, you should know that by now." Naruto smiled.

One thing about Naruto, he didn't need anyone to take up for him. He knew how to take up for himself. He had been knowing Sasuke for years now, so he wasn't too sensitive about smart comments Sasuke made.

" Hey I forgot, I have to go see my parents today. They've been begging me all week." Naruto grinned.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. ' Hmp, someone actually begs to see Naruto?'

Kiba nodded. " Yea I miss my parents. I wonder if Kakashi has any kids."

" Who cares if Kakashi has kids." Sasuke said rudely. " Kakashi is a freak, no woman wants him."

" That's not true, " Naruto shouted. " A lot of girls like him, believe it!"

Sasuke put his book away. " Well I don't see them." He said under his breath.

" Hey... Do you think Kakashi ever had a crush, you know, on a student?" Kiba said.

" Kakashi is to bent over death to be bent over a girl." Sasuke said with knowledge. " He needs to be fired."

Naruto turned to Sasuke. " Sasuke where's your girlfriend?"

Sasuke looked up at the trees. He had to think of something good. " She moved, um, and she was my high school sweet heart... and, I vowed to never be with another."

Kiba crunched his face up. " You vowed to never be with another?"

Naruto even had to look. " Well that's stupid."

Sasuke shrugged. " Yea, well it's stupid and that's the end of it."

Naruto smiled sheepishly. " So..." He started.

Sasuke looked at him. " What?!"

" Did you guys get Naughty?" Naruto said seductively.

Kiba Smirked. " Yea, did you pop that thang?"

" What?" Sasuke questioned. " What do you mean popped that... thang?"

" You know, that high school cherry.." Kiba said waiting for details.

" Speak English Kiba," Sasuke said nervously. " I don't understand that crap!"

" Yea, you're already talking dirty and stuff." Naruto scolded Kiba.

" I don't know what kind of perverted stuff you guys are talking about, but I refuse to take part." Sasuke said.

" Wow," Kiba said surprised, " So you never hit it?"

Naruto laughed. " Oh please, even I have a naughty story to tell. Sasuke must just be shy!"

Sasuke blushed. His friends were probably about to start comparing notes. That's when He noticed he had no notes.

" Oh Naruto," Sasuke said nervously.

" Yea Sasuke."

"Could we not talk about-"

" Hey!" Naruto interrupted. " For as long as I've known you I've never seen you have a high school sweetheart!"


	3. Big party

**OK, so I was late in submitting this chapter, my bad. I'm square!**

**OK, Today wasn't a good day for me. Had to go to the ER for D&C b/c of miscarriage with twins, last week.Turns out all of the material didn't come out, so I was feeling really sick. Any who, I got back home and was able to start working on this Fic and my other. I won't ramble in the A/N to much in this chapter. Feeling a bit depressed, but I'll get over it. On with the warnings:**

**Surprisingly, not a lot of cussing this time. This chapter is very smooth. But there's still a red CUSSING flag.**

**It might seem like I have animosity towards some characters..I don't, I'm just a smart ass about everything.**

**This is not a yaoi. There will be times you may be tricked into thinking it is, but it's not.**

**There is a slight M warning for this chapter. I still consider it to be T, but others may disagree. Ratings may go up, depending on if I feel like getting into detail if anything should happen.**

**Strong drug usage. Please don't call me your influence.**

**Sasuke is mildly out of Character near the end.**

**I do not own Naruto, please don't sue me.**

**Chapter: #3**

**Title: Loosen up Sasuke**

Sasuke brushed off the comment Naruto made about him not having a high school sweetheart. Though it was true he didn't, he didn't want everyone to know that he was a a-hem, virgin.

He never had time for girls, or to get to know what they were like. He was so busy in studying and after class activities, that a girl was the last thing on his mind. The only girl he really would speak to was Sakura, but he didn't like her. He never stopped once to even wonder if she liked him.

What if Sakura did like him? How would he know?

He didn't know why he was thinking about girls right now. Maybe he was finally getting interested in them?

" Kiba, you've told me what's on your mind, you wanna kill Kakashi." Sasuke said." Now that we've talked about it, I wanna get back to the school so I can get some sleep."

" Ah yea, Thanks for hearing me out.! " Kiba nodded.

" So do you still wanna kill Kakashi?" Naruto added, with that dumb ass grin.

" Well, yea I'm still thinking about it." Kiba said unsure. " You never know, I just might murder him, if he begs me enough."

" Well, I'll see you two later, don't bother calling, I'll be sleep." Sasuke said while turning to go back to the school.

" OK, bye Sasuke, see you when I get back to the dorm." Naruto waved.

Sasuke cringed. ' Why me...?'

" Oh wait, I may not come back tonight, I have to run by my parents house." Naruto said scratching his head. "I got a surprise for you."

" No surprises!" Sasuke said annoyed.

" What you don't like surprises?" Naruto questioned.

" Not from you.." Sasuke said sick of talking to Naruto already.

" Don't worry, you're gonna love it." Naruto assured him.

" Bye Naruto."

" Bye Sasuke."

Kiba stared, " Is anybody gonna say bye to me."

" Oh yea, later Kiba." Sasuke added, not really caring. He turned and headed back to the school. He was looking forward to getting some extra rest.

Naruto turned to Kiba. " Sooo, you wanna know my surprise for Sasuke?"

" Hmm, well what is it?"

" Ok don't tell him I told you this."

" Ok."

" I'm going to..."

"Spill it already Naruto!" Kiba said excitingly.

" I'm gonna throw him Party."

" What?," Kiba said surprised, " You know Sasuke's not going to go to any parties!"

" I know, but I'm going to trick him into going." Naruto said smiling.

" Where you gonna throw the party?" Kiba asked.

Naruto frowned." Huh?". He didn't think about that. Where was he going to throw the party?

" I don't know Naruto, I don't think Sasuke is going to appreciate you tricking him into things." Kiba warned him.

" Chill out, nobody knows Sasuke like I know him." Naruto said, thinking about where he was going to throw the party.

" You'd better have that in tact." Kiba warned again.

Naruto jumped. " DAMN!" he yelled.

" Huh, what?" Kiba said startled from Naruto's reaction.

" Sorry Kiba, I gotta go see my parents and I'm late, C'ya!" Naruto yelled while running back to the school.

Kiba blinked. " OK, Call me when you get everything set up!"

Naruto ran to the parking lot and opened his car door with the keys. He knew his parents would be the best people to ask if he wanted to throw this party. Even though they would say no, at least it was still worth asking...If he asked over and over.

It wasn't long before he arrived at his parents house, begging about the party before even saying ' HI'.

"So can I mom and dad...Please!" Naruto begged, with that retard grin that seemed to make everyone say yes.

" No Naruto! You're not throwing any parties in my house. I wouldn't even let you dance in my living room alone... Something might get broke." His dad said.

" Will." His mother corrected him.

" Something will get broke." His dad corrected himself, like he didn't already know.

" Aw, c'mon, I'm 20 years old. You're always treating me like a little kid." Naruto whined.

" Well, since you're 20, doesn't that mean you should be out having your own place?" His mother questioned. " You can throw as many parties as you like then."

" No mom, I need a house to throw a party in tonight!" Naruto started angrily. " You both know why I haven't gotten my own place yet, I'm in school."

" Speaking of school, How have you been doing in there. You haven't been keeping in touch lately. We're not paying for you to go to college for our health." His dad said folding his arms.

" I'm doing great. I have the books, so I have the power!" Naruto said with force. But inside of his head he knew he was dead lying.

" That's great Naruto, it's a beautiful thing to hear." His mom said smiling.

" So can I throw that party?" Naruto said hoping to get a yes.

" No!" His parents said at the same time.

Naruto frowned. ' I'm gonna throw that party for Sasuke, and no one's gonna stand in my way...Not even my parents." He thought to himself.

" I gotta gotta throw that party!" Naruto said frustratingly. " You guys are not cooperating. You're really gonna make me do something bad."

" Now Naruto, don't talk non sense." His dad said, trying to calm a now aggravated Naruto down.

" No, you guys haven't really seen me when I'm mad!" Naruto shouted. " I'm gonna be pissed if I can't throw that party, I already told Sasuke I had a surprise for him."

" Well then change the surprise. It's not like you told him what the surprise was." His mom said.

Naruto had a devilish look in his eyes. " I'm throwing that party.." He said in a low threatening growl.

Time passed by quickly. Sasuke opened his eyes and stretch his arm muscles. He had only slept for 2 hours, and the whole dream was about girls.

He was surprised because normally his dreams were about, graduating or being a world genius. You know, a lot of people admiring him and stuff.

Normally he'd wake up with a book next to him, ready to ready to read. This time he woke up with a," Whaaaat?!" Sasuke screamed. " OMG WTF!" Sasuke Yelled.

He got up and ran to the bathroom and grabbed a washcloth. Negative thoughts raced through his mind. " WTF, WTF, WTF!" He repeated.

He could not believe what was happening to him. He wasn't used to thinking perverted things. " My day couldn't get any worst." Sasuke cried.

Then he heard the clicking, opening, and closing of the door. " Hi Sasuke!" Naruto yelled. " ... Sasuke?"

Sasuke gritted his teeth. He rushed forward and slammed the bathroom door closed.

" Sasuke?" Naruto yelled trying to figure out why Sasuke was acting weird. " Sasuke are you hiding?"

" Just wait for me to get out the bathroom!" Sasuke yelled.

" OK, I wanted to know if you'd go to this party my parents are throwing you." Naruto lied.

" What?!" Sasuke said while wiping himself off. " Why are your parents throwing me a party?"

" Don't know, but I told them you like books, I think they got you some." yet another lie Naruto told.

Sasuke knew Naruto was lying, but his experiences today caused him to put that in the back of his mind.

" Naruto, I need to ask you something." Sasuke said a bit embarrassed.

" OK, " Naruto said from behind the door. " Um, but could you open the door first?"

Sasuke hesitated. He didn't want to let someone like Naruto know what he was going through.

He opened the door and walked out the bathroom. He gave Naruto a glance, then headed for the bed to sit down.

" I'm having some thoughts, nasty ones." Sasuke said, his voice a bit shaky.

" Whoa, Sorry man, I don't get down like that, I know you probably thought I -"

" Shut up, I didn't mean gay thoughts you retard!"

" Oh, well what did you mean?" Naruto said innocently.

" You know... girls... I've been thinking about them..."

Naruto smiled hard " SASUKE...!"

Sasuke gasped. " Naruto...Don't!

" Sasuke wants to have sex, Sasuke wants to have sex!" Naruto repeated singing. " Sasuke wants to have sex!"

Sasuke rushed to Naruto to cover his mouth, only to fall on the floor from from missing his now moving target- Dancing to be exact.

" Sasuke wants some sex, Sasuke needs a girlfriend!" Naruto continued singing.

" You idiot!" Sasuke yelled embarrassed. " I don't want anything!"

" Oh don't deny it Sasuke, you want some hot sex, and you're asking me were to get it!"

Sasuke sunk his head to his shoulders. " I had a dream..." He started." It was about this girl, I didn't quite know her but... We ended up doing something...you know, reproduction?"

" Yea I know what reproduction means Sasuke," Naruto said smartly," So how did you feel when you woke up?"

Sasuke glanced to the left as a blush spread on his face. " I felt satisfied... In a way"

Naruto scratched his head. " Oh, now I don't understand."

Sasuke shook his head. " Anyways, I just want to know why I'm having these dreams.. And does your perverted ass have them too?.."

" Oh, so you're having sex dreams and-" Naruto said before being jumped on.

Sasuke covered Naruto's mouth tightly." Try keeping your mouth shut this time!!!"

Sasuke uncovered his mouth. " So, do you?"

Naruto just looked at him plainly. " Yea from time to time, but it's normally when I don't get sex in a long time." Naruto smirked.

Sasuke gently eased up off of Naruto. " I should have known this already. With all the books I read." Sasuke murmured to himself.

" So what's up with that party." Naruto said, while rubbing his neck. Sasuke basically had him in a choke hold.

" What party... Oh yea. No." Sasuke said while trying to escape to the bathroom.

" What will it take to make you go?" Naruto whined.

Sasuke turned to him, he had to think for a minute. " hmmmm..."

Naruto stared stupidly while waiting for his reply.

" OK, I got something," Sasuke started. " You have to take a whole day off and study with me...Deal?"

Naruto laughed. " Are you kidding, that's it?"

Sasuke nodded and grinned. " For you, this will be a super challenge. So what do you say?"

" Yea!" Naruto shouted. " And don't worry, I'm going to throw you the best freaking party ever!"

Sasuke lost his smile. " OK, now leave me alone." He said while entering the bathroom and shutting the door behind him.

A few hours passed and before Sasuke knew it they were in the car, driving, and magically at Naruto's house.

Sasuke felt like he shouldn't have accepted Naruto's party invite.

" OK," Naruto said. " The party already started, I had Kiba watch the party so I could come and get you."

"Wow, you're such a great friend." Sasuke said sarcastically.

They went into the house and up the stairs. Sasuke shook his head as he watched the party animals get down on the floor.

" Fucking Ingrates." He said under his breath.

When they entered Naruto's room, Kiba was there, sitting in a chair with 2 chairs around him. " C'mon, lets get this over with." Kiba said impatiently." Do you know how long I've been staring at this blunt?"

" Blunt?" Sasuke asked. " Naruto you smoke ...weed?"

Naruto shrugged. " Only sometimes, but today your gonna get lit!"

" No body's getting lit." Sasuke said rolling his eyes.

" Oh c'mon Sasuke..c'mon!" Naruto pleaded..as usual.

" Damn it Naruto... You are always getting me into some shit. Next you're going to want me to have a threesome, with one of the wild chicks downstairs."

Naruto sighed from relief. " Phew, I though you were going to say with Kiba."

" What?!" Sasuke said. " Only you, only you would think of something so fucking stupid."

" And Gay..." Kiba added. " You forgot the gay part.."

Sasuke and Naruto sat down in the chairs. Kiba fired the blunt up.

" OK, this is really gonna help you loosen up." Naruto said handing him the blunt first." If you don't like the more fun, better, un boring, interesting, person you become, then I promise I'll leave you alone about the whole thing."

Sasuke sighed. It just wasn't who he was. The kind of person he was, was hard working and drug free. What was Naruto going to ask him to do next...pop pills? This was the last time he would give into Naruto's peer pressure.

Sasuke gripped the funny shaped so called ' Blunt'. He placed it to his mouth and sucked inward, letting most of the smoke out.

" Damn Sasuke," Kiba complained. " You're letting most of the smoke out, stop wasting it!"

" Whoops," Sasuke said embarrassed. " I've never done this shit before."

" Just lay back and chill out, you're really going to enjoy it!" Naruto assured him.

Sasuke began puffing the hell out of the blunt." The smoke tastes disgusting. What is that popping noise? Are you guys sure this stuff is safe?" Sasuke started.

Kiba rolled his eyes. " Looks like someones high already..."

" Pass it Sasuke!" Naruto complained.

"Yea Sasuke stop hogging it!" Kiba said.

" Oh!" Sasuke said a bit jumpy. " I'm starting to feel weird!"

" It's OK, you're just high.." Naruto said while taking the blunt from Sasuke. " Try not to think about it!"

' OK...Try not to think about it, try not to think about. It's so hard not to think about it cause I keep thinking about it..OMG I don't like being high...Are they looking at me? Can they tell how high I am?' Sasuke thought uncontrollably. " The room is spinning." Sasuke blurted.

" Yep" Naruto said in a squeaky voice from holding in smoke.

' Did he just say yep? Is he high like I am? My head hurts. Why does my head hurt? I bet it's the weed. Why is my heart beating so fast?'

The room continued to spin, well to Sasuke. His heart began to beat harder and faster. He wasn't aware that the weed makes your heart beat faster, so he got even more nervous.

Sasuke's hand twitched. ' OMG am I twitching? there is something wrong with me...Oh no, please don't let me break out into a shaking spell. I would look so lame if I did.'

" Sasuke chill out over there, you look like some one's about to kill you." Kiba smiled.

" Kiba how does weed make you feel, I'm not sure, but I don't think I'm feeling weed the wrong way." Sasuke said trembling.

" Cool down buddy.There is no right or wrong way, you're focusing on it way to hard." Kiba said getting up and putting the blunt out. " Even Naruto's taking it better than you!"

Sasuke and Kiba turned to Naruto, who was passed out sleeping.

' I never want to get high again!' Sasuke thought to himself while his hand continued twitching ' I look like a damn fool!'

Sasuke sat in the chair for an hour before joining the party. He didn't want to talk to anybody, because they were all fools.

Dancing all over the place, drinking until they became even bigger idiots, and the girls were bound to become sluts after a few drinks.

' hmmm, I wonder if I can pick one up?'

Too late, one had already came to him. She had black hair and a skimpy skirt on. She was holding 2 blue plastic cups, clearly containing alcohol. Her approach was staggering and she was a hot mess.

" Hi, you're that Sassie kid aren't ya?" she said, a drunken mess.

" Sasuke." He corrected her.

" Sassie?" she questioned dumbly. " Did you say Sassie, I said that already?!"

" Sasuke!" He yelled. " It's god damn Sasuke, I don't know how you mistake that for Sassie.."

" Look Sasmay, you don't gotta get all ruffensive. Just enjoy the partay!" she said, sounding more drunk than before.

Sasuke looked away. her being around him was a bit embarrassing. " So are you gonna tell me your name?" He questioned.

" Hey, that's for me to know...and for...me to..know..." She said unsure.

Sasuke giggled. " You should stop drinking, you've had enough...at least put down one of the cups."

" O I brought tis for you. you need need to loosen your shirt.." she said staring at him.

Sasuke nodded. " Well, I do need to loose up a bit." He admitted.

" No, I mean loosen up your shirt, I wanna see your chest." she said, just like a drunken slut.

Sasuke took the cup from her and took a sip. He was starting to get a bit hungry. OK, maybe REALLY hungry.

" I'm not about to take off my shirt for you...you freak.." he said swallowing more alcohol this time.

Naruto rushed by Sasuke." Oooo, who's your lady friend!"

She stared at Naruto now. " Hey, that's for me to know, and you to..know.."

Naruto stared, not quite sure what to say. " ...OK?...Any who, Sasuke I've gotta run to the store, I totally forgot the chips and stuff."

" So, I'm not about to watch your party."

" I know, that's why I'm asking you to go, since you don't drink."

Sasuke held the plastic cup up.

" Oh, well in that case...Can you watch my party pleaseeee Sasuke?!" Naruto pleaded.

" Oh no, I'm not about to watch your animals!" Sasuke said gulping down the last of the drink. " Hey weird girl, go get me another drink."

" I'm not weird!" she spat.

" OK, whatever...Can you get me another drink?"

The girl rolled her eyes and went by the punch bowl.

" OK, well, I know you're going to get the munchies soon, then you'll come back crying to me." Naruto said, folding his arms with a grin. " Yep, you're gonna beg me to go to the store and get food."

Sasuke's stomach was roaring. He felt so hungry he could eat one of his books. " Damn I feel it."

Naruto just grinned.

" Ok, alright...I'll watch your animals, but if one gets loose..." Sasuke murmured.

" Thanks Sasuke! Naruto said running out the door. " I'll be RIGHT back!"

The girl came to him and handed him the cup. Her drunkenness sicken him, and she looked like a whore.

" Does your mother dress you every morning?" Sasuke said giving the drink CPR technically.

" Wow, you're drinking pretty hard." she said, ignoring his question." You drink everyday?"

" Ah, I'm not really a drinker. I'm just really thirsty." He said.

Sasuke could feel he was a bit looser now. Was it the drink?

" Hey I really like you..you're cute!" She said.

Sasuke stared into her eyes. " I like you too..."

She blushed. " hmmm, you mean you like what's between my legs.." She said smiling.

" No, not really." He said. " I'm a virgin, I've never had sex."

" Wow that is so, sexy, guys that wait!" she said, still tripping over her words.

Sasuke felt like his listening problem got worst, but he was still blunt ass hell.

" Well, even if I weren't a virgin, I'd still be sexy as hell." He confessed.

" Yes you are a cutie." She said, turned on by him now.

Sasuke was too busy chatting it up, he didn't notice a guy stealing a painting off the wall. He also didn't notice the guy who puked in the bathroom...and missed the toilet.

" do you wanna go to another room...It's getting loud." Sasuke said, a bit intoxicated.

" Yea." She said in a sexy voice, letting him know she was ready for some sex...Just like a whore!!

**Author HERE!!!:**

**OK that was some crazy SH. If Sasuke wasn't drunk, he would not be doing this. Is he going to lose his virginity?...HMMMM, no one knows!!! you'll just have to find out!!**


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